Post by haqpr1963 on Jun 18, 2009 11:02:13 GMT
Disclaimer! This is a work of satire....
Dear Diary,
Arrived back in london at the weekend clutching my winners medal from the Butlins (Belfast) Donkey Derby. Always good to get off to a winning start in a new job, had to laugh when I noticed that all of the mounts were named after members of last seasons QPR strike force....
Woken up at 3am by a text message from the club. Looked bleary eyed at the screen of my brand new club mobile (Solid 24 carat gold plated plastic with tasteful diamonte accents, only £7500 from the club shop (plus £699 a year on the new FlavTel pay-through-the-nose-as-you-go tariff). Seems to have a slight problem though as it will only receive incoming calls from Mr. Briatore) Noticed the text was from the Ticket Office asking why they had not yet received payment for my season ticket? Will sort that out later when I get into the office.
Arrived at HQ, still have to use the visitors space in the car park, pleased to see that due to the current economic climate the club have not increased the pay and display prices so far this week, sadly missed the Early Bird offer that was in place between 0700 and 0705....
Noticed Gary Borrowdale in the car park. WOW that kid simply oozes quality, I don't think I have ever seen Mr. Paladini's car looking so clean....
Called the Ticket Office about their text message pointing out that I was actually the clubs new manager. They said they would sort it out....
Got a text from the Ticket Office asking why they had not received payment for my HALF-SEASON ticket....
Called Mr. Briatore to ask him about the chances of getting my old mate John Gorman onboard as my number 2. Amazingly he said that John sounded like the perfect man for the position. I asked if this was because of his reputation as a coach and scout? He said partly, but mainly because they had just found a box of John Gregory's old kit and it would only take Edna half an hour to sew the new badges on....
Popped into the Club shop on the way home. Great to see lots of youngsters in there, even saw one young lady leaving with one of those gnomes that they stock. Mentioned this to the guy behind the counter, he looked embarassed and mumbled something about Mr. Ecclestone and his new "friend". Hmmm....
More later....
Dear Diary,
Arrived back in london at the weekend clutching my winners medal from the Butlins (Belfast) Donkey Derby. Always good to get off to a winning start in a new job, had to laugh when I noticed that all of the mounts were named after members of last seasons QPR strike force....
Woken up at 3am by a text message from the club. Looked bleary eyed at the screen of my brand new club mobile (Solid 24 carat gold plated plastic with tasteful diamonte accents, only £7500 from the club shop (plus £699 a year on the new FlavTel pay-through-the-nose-as-you-go tariff). Seems to have a slight problem though as it will only receive incoming calls from Mr. Briatore) Noticed the text was from the Ticket Office asking why they had not yet received payment for my season ticket? Will sort that out later when I get into the office.
Arrived at HQ, still have to use the visitors space in the car park, pleased to see that due to the current economic climate the club have not increased the pay and display prices so far this week, sadly missed the Early Bird offer that was in place between 0700 and 0705....
Noticed Gary Borrowdale in the car park. WOW that kid simply oozes quality, I don't think I have ever seen Mr. Paladini's car looking so clean....
Called the Ticket Office about their text message pointing out that I was actually the clubs new manager. They said they would sort it out....
Got a text from the Ticket Office asking why they had not received payment for my HALF-SEASON ticket....
Called Mr. Briatore to ask him about the chances of getting my old mate John Gorman onboard as my number 2. Amazingly he said that John sounded like the perfect man for the position. I asked if this was because of his reputation as a coach and scout? He said partly, but mainly because they had just found a box of John Gregory's old kit and it would only take Edna half an hour to sew the new badges on....
Popped into the Club shop on the way home. Great to see lots of youngsters in there, even saw one young lady leaving with one of those gnomes that they stock. Mentioned this to the guy behind the counter, he looked embarassed and mumbled something about Mr. Ecclestone and his new "friend". Hmmm....
More later....