Post by haqpr1963 on Jun 5, 2009 8:27:37 GMT
Thurs. 4th June, 2009.
Dear Diary,
Woke up bright and early looking forward to this exciting new chapter in my managerial career. (Note to self : don't read club website before going to bed...)
Dressed in the lovely new suit Mr. Briatore got for me from his Billionaire store. The quality is excellent and with my staff discount it was only £4000 down and 6 convenient monthly payments of £2000. I even get to keep it when I leave, so long as I pay off the outstanding balance...
Arrived at Loftus Road. Lots of building work going on, notice it is now being rebranded as "Il Stadio Flavio, (Billionaire Club (White City))". Nice to see the owners getting so involved, the neon signs flashing "Flavio's" are pure class....
Asked the guy on the gate where my parking space was. He smiled and said I should use the visitors space like all the recent managers. Luckily he had change for the "Pay and Display" machine...
Met Mr. Briatore in his office (along with his "Associates" Umberto and Ricardo, blimey they make them big in Italy!) Told him what a pleasure it was to be working at QPR, and that I was looking forward to a long and fruitful relationship with the board. He gave me a funny look when I said that. Umberto and Ricardo smiled...
Mr Briatore said I should think of the club as my new home, well he actually said "temporary, short-term, foster home", but I knew what he meant...
Asked Mr. Briatore about his interesting paperweight, have to admit I would never have thought of using a stuffed black cat for that! He gave me that look again. Umberto and Ricardo had a fit of giggles....
Mr. Briatore invited me to lunch at Cipriani's along with Mr. Ecclestone, Mr. Mittal, Mr. Bhatia, Mr. Agag, Mr. Russell, Umberto, Ricardo and Mr. Paladini. . Great food and they even graciously allowed me to pay. Mr. Paladini looked relieved, apparently that is one of his roles I will be taking over....
On the way back to "Il Stadio Flavio" Mr. Briatore asked me if I had any concerns about the new job. I did mention that I had heard that some of the season ticket holders were a fickle bunch and had a habit of turning on the manager. He said not to worry as Mr. Russell and the Board were well on the way to removing that problem as we spoke...
Met the managerial support team, back at "ISF". Ernie, the handyman, who oiled the revolving door on my office and chalked my name on the slate hanging from a hook next to it. His sister Edna, who is in charge of sewing the initials on all of the managers kit. She asked Mr. Briatore for a new sewing machine as the motor had burnt out in her current one. And, Enzo, my liaison with the board, who would helpfully fill in the team sheets for me. Wow, these successful businessmen think of everything.
Finally got to see my office, seemed a bit cluttered with items left behind by its previous occupants (Portugal caps, a full set of Italian-English phrase books (unused), etc.) I asked what I should do with them, and was told I should put them in the Black Plastic Waste Holding Receptical in the corner. I asked if they meant the Sack. The room went silent, Mr. Briatore winced. Umberto and Ricardo reached into their jackets. (Note to self : apparently we don't use that word here)...
Asked if I could talk to Gareth about the playing staff. Mr. Briatore said this would not be possible as Gareth now has an essential support role in the new structure of the club, apparently this is for life and is set in concrete. Umberto and Ricardo burst out laughing...
On the way out Mr. Briatore gave me the keys to the executive washroom. He said I could find the mop, bucket, toilet rolls, etc. in the locker in my office...
Ahh that Mr. Briatore, It's the way he tells them.......
